Dear Daddy

23 Apr

Dad,

You are the most amazing father I know—and yes I am prejudice, but who cares.  You are kind, understanding, wise, and always say the right things (even if I can’t stand hearing it).
I love you.  It is something we rarely say to each other, but I know you love me more than anything else.  I know when you give me a hug, when you hold me, you are showing me just how much I mean to you.
You have been through more pain than I can ever imagine, and yet you never show it.  I know you stayed strong for me; so I could grow from your strength and heal more quickly.  One of the best things you have given me is strength and independence.  You taught me how to take care of myself, and how to take care of others.  And even though I have this tough exterior, I cannot even imagine what I would do without you.
We talk two or three times a week—and when we go more than a few days not talking, it feels like forever.  Anytime something good happens, something bad happens, something strange happens, you are the first person I want to tell.  The first person I call.  You support me in everything I do, and I know just how proud of me you are.  I can see it in the way you look at me.  Like the one time I told you about my interview, and how great it went.  You smiled so big and even laughed a little because you couldn’t hold in all your happiness.
Honestly, I don’t know what I would do without you—and sometimes that scares me.  I want to be able to be strong on my own, especially because I know you will leave me some day.  For now though, I want you to remain a huge part of my life.  I beg you not to leave me; I need you here as long as possible.  On my wedding day, one of the most amazing experiences will be when you walk me down that aisle.  I don’t have dreams about the man waiting for me at the altar—I dream about how happy I will be to have you next to me.  Leading me into my future; taking those first few steps of my new life, right by my side.  Though you will be letting go of some small parts of me, I know the parts you keep are worth more than anything else.

I love you more than I could ever express.

I leave you with the words of Ben Folds.  These lyrics encapsulate everything I know our relationship is.  It’s so perfect, but imperfect in the most incredible way.

-Ashleykins

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