Dear Universe

14 Oct

Dear Universe,Holding Hands

You think this is funny don’t you?
To make me like this.
I always laugh when people say it’s a choice.  Yeah ‘cause it’s a choice to be alienated by everyone you love, to have strangers judge and curse you to hell and oblivion.  The only thing that hurts worse than strangers words, are your family’s.  Parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, everyone who is supposed to love you unconditionally, one day doesn’t.
It’s like they woke up and just changed their minds.  No love for you anymore, because of who you love.
I don’t want to hide anymore. I am sick and tired of hiding.  Why is it that I can’t hold her hand in public but you can mack on your trashy girlfriend on the EL.  Its crap.  Most of the time I pretend like I am mad, but I’m not. I am heartbroken.
It’s just not fair.
I know that makes me sound like a 6-year-old who wants to stay up later to finish the movie but it’s true. My rights are taken away and infringed on because it makes you uncomfortable. Well you know what?? When you stop licking your boyfriend’s neck at my favorite Thai restaurant, I’ll think about lessening the hand holding…but don’t hold your breath.
I am told that loving her is a sin, that God will judge me come the day.  Well you know what?  Kissing her is the closest I have ever felt to God.  No joke.  She is my salvation.  She is my everything.
We would have beautiful children.  We really would, people take that for granted a lot of the time, their ability to reproduce.  It’s a gift.
Between the 2 of us our children would be musical, beautiful, athletic, dramatic, left brain users, right brain users, they would be a gift to the world.  And ‘ya know what.  They still will be…nurture over nature my dears, that’s just how it has to be.  And that’s how it will be, because we will be great mothers.

Suck it.

Sincerely,
m

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2 Responses to “Dear Universe”

  1. martha October 14, 2009 at 2:36 pm #

    Why did you think I wouldn’t follow you on Twitter?? You’re a wonderful writer and full of gutsy inner strength.

  2. Bec November 13, 2009 at 1:10 am #

    Be strong. Love her as much as you can and tell anyone who’s not cool with that to piss off.

    Love comes from the soul, from the most basic part of our being, so God must have intended for you to be this way.

    Live your life the way you choose and don’t change for some homophobic losers.

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