Dear “I messed up…”

10 Jan

Dear J,

 I am more sorry than I have ever been. This day saddenes me for many reasons. Why? Well what is going on between us?  You tell me you  can’t believe what I did to you.  Truth is I can’t believe it either. I regret it more and more every day. I would slit my wrists if I could take that day back.  But since then I have been working so hard to get you back and you have noticed but you said you want to move on, yet you walk me to each class, kiss me, hug me, lend me your sweatshirts, but really, I miss you more than anything. I will never forgive myself for cheating on you with that scum bag.  I was under the influence, and I messed up, so badly in fact I wish I could erase that point of time.  He left me feeling like a useless, dirty whore. Well that’s exactly what I am.  I need you in my life more than anything and anyone, but I will never be in your  life again, why?  Well because I messed up.  I love you always and forever

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