Dear Self

21 Feb

Dear Self,
Why do you do this to yourself? He wouldn’t want you hurting yourself, he hated it and made him want to cry. You promised him no matter how bad things got, you wouldn’t hurt myself. You broke that promise to yourself and him. I wonder if he knows you’ve been doing it, when it’s been about eight months since he ended what we had and two months since you saw him last. Imagine how angry he’d be. You know it’s bad when you’re so ashamed you can’t talk to your best friends about it. If you loved/love him, you would stop. He wants you to be happy, even if you’re not gonna give up at least stop damaging yourself more. He would shutter if he saw how I am now. But I know you need him. His presence not being around is weighing heavy on your mind and heart. You’re a different person now, and it scares me. You need to stop letting this control your life. You can’t keep doing this to yourself. For his sake and yours, stop.

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