Dear Best Friend

3 Mar

Dear Best Friend,

I’m sorry for falling in love with you, for making a pass at you, for believing for a while that you could feel the same way too.

I’m sorry for crashing my car, for making you worry, for what I now know you’re doing to yourself because of me.

I’m sorry that because of me you’re putting your life on hold, you’re not chasing your dream, and you’re not going after the boy you’re falling for, and its all because of me, my lack of strength, my stupid feelings.

I’m sorry, for everything..

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One Response to “Dear Best Friend”

  1. Best Friend, always March 3, 2010 at 6:33 pm #

    Dear Best Friend,
    Listen to me, please.

    Stop apologising. It’s not your fault. You don’t have to be sorry for anything. But while we’re doing this:

    I’m sorry for making you think there was a possibility and I’m sorry I don’t feel the same way. I’m sorry for hurting you. It’s not your fault.

    I’m sorry for not dealing with it better, and for making you so upset and hurt and crashing your car into that stupid tree. It’s not your fault.

    I’m sorry for making you worry about me worrying. It’s in my nature, I worry and I’m a bit paranoid, but that’s just me. Nothing to do with you. It’s not your fault.

    I do not do it because of you, it’s nothing to do with you. I’m sorry that you think that but you should not feel any guilt about that whatsoever. It’s my stupid problem, infact it’s not even my problem anymore, or at least I hope not – and that’s thanks to you. So thank yourself, instead of making yourself feel guilty. It’s not your fault.

    I’m not putting my life on hold. I’m happy, I’m hyper, I’m me. I’m fine, I always am and I always will be. My dreams go beyond that, and I’ve told you before, chasing dreams is pointless if there aren’t people to chase them with you: people like you. It’s not your fault.

    You are strong, stronger than you think. Sometimes you are a bit little and weak. Sometimes I could pound you, but I know you’re strong because you’ve been strong for me and you’ve been strong through everything you’ve been through. So don’t apologise. It’s not your fault.

    Your feelings are not stupid. Not to me. They never are. Nothing about you is stupid to me. Every single thing is important, special, unique, perfect. It’s not your fault.

    “I’m sorry, for everything”. Don’t be. You don’t have to be. You shouldn’t be. You never have to be sorry, not to me. It is not your fault.

    It is not your fault. And ultimately, there is no fault to be had. Nothing is wrong, nothing is hurt, nothing is broken, nothing needs a fault. Not in regards to me. There is nothing for you to be sorry for, there is nothing that you need to apologise for, not to me, not now, not ever. It’s never your fault. Never.

    I’m your best friend, always will be. I don’t need apologies, I don’t want apologies, all I want is you, as my best friend always, because à moi, vous êtes toujours parfaits :).

    So don’t be sorry, because I’m sorry enough for the both of us. I really am. So sorry,
    love
    your best friend, always x

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