Dear SH

25 Apr

I don’t know why I’m torturing myself with you. I can’t help it. I can’t leave you alone. I’m a strong person- I don’t need people. And yet I humiliate myself over and over by not saying goodbye to you. My heart sings when I see your name pop up on my phone, but dies when I don’t hear from you for a couple of days. I keep holding on to things you have said that I so badly want to be true, but probably aren’t. And yet I so quickly forget the hurtful things you’ve said and how badly it made my heart hurt.
I know our circumstances make it impossible for us to be together- and working together makes it hard for us to be apart, but would you even want to try if all the barriers were removed? And why do I even care so much?!? Is it just the impossibility, the forbidden fruit, that makes the pull so strong?
I will wait for time to solve my questions. Until then, I sleep tonight dreaming of you.


One Response to “Dear SH”

  1. Ashley June 1, 2011 at 4:47 am #

    U wouldn’t happen to work at a popular seafood restaurant, would you? With a view of a mall & mountains?

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